A Criminal Defense Lawyer's New Year's Resolutions

I resolve:

To my clients:

[1] To never concern myself with your attempts to make me believe that somehow I am responsible for your current situation.

[2] That I will listen to you when you tell me what your lawyer friend in New York said about your Florida case. Once.

[3] That I will continue to tell you what I think, regardless of how much it may bother you.

[4] That I will continue to meet all my obligations to you, as long as you meet all your obligations to me. This isn't about money. It's about being on time, showing up at a scheduled meeting, getting me that witnesses' name and phone number that "saw everything," and returning phone calls.

[5] That I will continue to cut you off as soon as you begin the "isn't prosecuting me a waste of taxpayer's money," crap.

[6] That I will continue to be the one in our relationship who decides whether "this is a good case" for me, and whether it's a "simple case."

[7] To continue my policy of not rescheduling a missed initial consultation (save for emergencies). One of the best decisions I've made.

[8] To continue to quote "ballpark" fees over the phone in an effort to prevent a wasted hour of being told that "this is a good case" for me, and that it's a "simple case," and I should basically do it for free, because you have no money, and you're innocent, and the government is out to get you and, well, you know.

To judges:

[1] That I will always call when I am going to be late to your courtroom, and appreciate you doing.......nevermind. Next.

[2] That I will "file a motion" for the unbelievably simple thing I am asking for that no one cares if you grant. I just ask that.... you read it.

[3] That I will respect your vacation schedule, time needed for family obligations, need to be out of town for conferences, and the fact that you have other cases you need to get to. I just ask that...... You know, this section is not getting very far.

Let's try:

Prosecutors:

[1] To stick to my code of ethics, especially the part that requires me to give you a free shot to not be the horror that everyone claims you are.

[2] To continue to abide by whatever I tell you, in writing, over the phone, in court, in the bathroom, cafeteria, or ballgame. I trust you'll do the same.

[3] That while we are both "just doing our jobs," I will never tell you that I am "just doing my job." Because people who say that are usually in the process of pissing someone off.

[4] Even if you are a complete jerk, I will continue to never object to a continuance because you need one for personal reasons. Everyone has a car accident, fight with their wife, family member sick, kid issues, and just generally the need for time off. Everyone.

[5] I will continue to respect that your job is different than mine. You do the same, please.

Fellow members of the criminal defense bar:

[1] I will continue to not disparage public defenders, ticket lawyers, DUI lawyers, lawyers who only represent clients charged with petit theft of food on a Tuesday night when there's a full moon, or any lawyer who is competent to accept representation of a person whose liberty is at stake. I will continue to get business because of who I am, not because of what I say about you.

[2] I will always let you cut in line at the podium. Even if you say no to me because you "gotta get somewhere." I have no problem quietly making you feel like a putz.

[3] I will continue to never accept a referral fee from you. Just take care of the client for me.

[4] I will continue to act as if we are all on the same team, even if you don't conduct yourself that way.

Non-criminal defense lawyers:

[1] I will continue to practice law like a human being. You want a confirmatory letter - write it yourself. Threaten me with trial - just tell me when. Give me unreasonable deadlines, they'll be ignored.

[2] I will continue to be respectful when I tell you that I could care less about your civil case against my client. Really, I could care less, but I wish you luck.

[3] I will continue to be respectful when you tell me how good your civil case is against my client. If it is that good, you should win. Again, good luck.

Happy New Year.



Brian Tannebaum is a criminal and Bar defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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Charlie Brown Terrorist Has Linus' Blanket Taken Away

On September 10, 2001 that some dude tried to light some liquid with a syringe and caused a small fire on board an airliner would have been an interesting story.

That it happened after September 11, 2001, makes it a 24 hour "developing" "unfolding" story affecting everyone traveling throughout the world, or thinking of traveling throughout the world.

Terrorists have one goal - fear. After September 11, 2001, that goal was met. We are in fear, permanently. As evidence, we spent the last 8 years hearing people support an American President for one main reason, the perception that he "kept us safe." As another example, there is rarely a candidate for office these days that does not tout "public safety" as their number one goal.

We are unsafe. Believe it, join the chorus. It's generally all we care about, or so we are told.

So over the holiday weekend some 23 year-old Nigerian student and son of a banker allegedly tries to blow up a plane bound for Detroit during the last hour of the flight. He fails miserably. And here come the buzz words - "Yemen," "Al-Qaida," "Terrorist."

He'll be tried, convicted and sentenced to life. That's the beginning and end of the discussion of the criminal defense angle of this story.

As more information was learned this weekend, more buzz words - "blankets," "pillows," "no taking a leak within one hour of landing."

Now I'm going to assume that this Charlie Brown terrorist went to the airport, had his one carry on and one personal item, took his shoes off, took his jacket off, had his boarding pass in his hand, showed his ID 4 times in 5 minutes, had his 3 ounces of liquid in a clear plastic bag, took his laptop out, and had his seat back and tray table locked and in their upright position upon take off.

But he caught on to a major security flaw - the ability to go to the bathroom within the last hour of flight, had have a blanket and pillow on his lap.

What were we thinking?

Now that's all gone.


Last hour of flight - no blanket, no pillow, and hold the bladder.

After spending the weekend hearing about this new "safety" policy, I finally heard someone say it - FOX's Greta Van Susteren said the policy was "almost insane." Fascinating to hear that on a network that spends most of it's time accusing the new administration of coddling terrorists and rolling back the War on Terrorism. The response to her comment was that a pilot thought it was done for the sole purpose of:

"Doing something."

And there we have it.

After the failure of the "shoe bomber," we were handed the policy of taking off our shoes and carrying small amounts of liquids in a clear plastic bag.

At the time, Comedian Bill Maher said something to the effect that one day someone with a blue hat would attempt a terrorist act on a plane, and the result would be a prohibition of blue hats on airplanes.

Our new policy of no blankets, pillows, or pissing in the last hour of flight, is that ridiculous. Why not include that Nigerian students that have bankers as parents are prohibited from flying?

On a holiday weekend where we were led to believe we were again "unsafe," our leaders had to "do something." And they did.

Just one question.

What if he tried to blow up the plane at the beginning of the flight.

Exactly.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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Maricopa County Rallies

They came, they spoke, they rallied.

Jeff Gamso, who I believe has owned this story in the blawgosphere, has the story here.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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Going The Maricopa County Lawyers Rally Today?

Certain events cause a groundswell, or as we call them in internet language "go viral."

That lawyers in Maricopa County, Arizona, have had enough and will meet at the courthouse today to show their solidarity, is unfortunately not one of those events.

I wonder why.

Googling this event brings up a few blog posts, and a brief clip from the Phoenix New Times.

I checked the website again for the Arizona Attorneys for Criminal Justice, but their event calendar doesn't mention it.

This is a bad time to expect a big crowd at any event, other than a holiday party or deep discount flat screen TV sale, but I do hope that the lawyers of Maricopa County, civil, and criminal, take their lunch hour and drop by the rally.

Having a large number of lawyers attend this event will make a big statement.

Having a small number of lawyers attend makes a bigger statement.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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The Constitution Makes An Appearance In Federal Court

There is too rarely a case in the criminal justice system that causes the collective public to react in amazement at what really goes on in the "no cameras in the courtroom" federal courts of America. I have always said that the reason cameras are prohibited in federal courts is because the government does not want people to see "what really goes on."

This order, my bedtime story last night, will have three reactions. The public will read in amazement that this conduct occurred, defense lawyers will cheer the judge for bringing to light a tactic as common as the sunrise, and prosecutors will call it an "isolated indident."

As usual, Scott Greenfield woke up earlier than me today and said it best.

Read the order. Make copies for your friends. If you haven't send holiday cards, send this instead. And read Scott's post.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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A Voluntary Surrender Becomes Another 6 a.m. Knock On The Door

A little while ago, while dreaming about nothing, thinking about nothing, and enjoying a rare sleep past 4 or 5 a.m., I heard it - the slight vibration on my nightstand.

The caller ID said it all.

It was the client promised a voluntary surrender months ago, weeks ago, and hours ago when the prosecutor called me yesterday late afternoon to say "it's time."

We agreed that this middle aged man charged with "white-collar" fraud would today walk himself into the jail at 11 a.m. It was all he wanted from the beginning of the representation. He knew he would be arrested, and he just wanted to surrender. From day one my first conversation with the prosecutor ended with "of course, no problem."

At least he now got a free ride, I guess.

Faithful readers of this blog, and those who spend more than 5 minutes with me talking about the criminal justice system know that this is a major pet-peeve of mine.

This time, I don't blame the prosecutor, I blame the cops.

Rule #1 or maybe 2 in criminal law is that when there is a warrant, there is an arrest. There is no explaining that it was issued in error, there is no nothing. A warrant means an arrest, period. In 15 years I've only had one client not arrested on a warrant (that I can remember) and it was a juvenile whose case was dismissed, and instead of that being entered into the record, a warrant issued and the cop was kind enough to give me a couple hours to go to court to clear it up with the judge.

But that was it.

This morning was the typical mindless script:

Cops come to door, client jumps in shower. Wife runs downstairs with me on the phone and says "he knows he's being arrested, he was told by the prosecutor (whose name is mentioned) to be at the jail at 11 a.m. We know the bond is $______, can you talk to his lawyer, he's on the phone?

The response was equally mindless: Deny knowledge of name of prosecutor (whose been there for many years and is well known), announce that "we have an order from a judge to arrest him," ignore that the person on the cell phone seems to know a great deal about this, (including when the cop said "the bond is," the wife said the exact amount), and at 6 a.m. is likely actually a real, living and breathing defense lawyer, and refuse to speak to me.

The cops relied on the rules, and to them, I'm just some scumbag defense lawyer who is trying to break them - probably trying to see if I can get my client out of the country on a case that he's known about for months and hasn't as much left his neighborhood.

So today will go like this: My client will get out, the prosecutor will apologize and tell me he never meant for that to happen. He may even contact the Sheriff's department, but probably not. No need to ruffle feathers with your friends. I'll write a letter to the Sheriff which, if responded to, will say that "I must understand" the seriousness of the task, and basically everyone will point fingers, if they even bother to use the energy to do so. Someone got arrested today, someone is in jail, that's all that matters. The public is "safer" because my client was picked up 5 hours before turning himself in.

It seems like the more I practice, the less I get this voluntary surrender down to a science. We live in an endless bureaucracy of "nobody told me," and "I didn't get the memo," and those will be the excuses that fly today.

And so recently I've begun to counsel clients to forget about voluntary surrenders and worry more about the case. Cops and prosecutors use voluntary surrenders as leverage and if the client "doesn't care," the leverage is gone. If the voluntary surrender happens - great. If not, let's move on.

Everyone did their "job" today. The prosecutor agreed to the surrender, the cops made their 6 a.m. arrest. The human component of all of this is buried under notions of defendant's fleeing the country, and an unwillingness to trust anyone, or even listen.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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The Arizona Association Of Criminal Defense Lawyers Is Here For You, Somewhere

After learning about the rally next Monday in Maricopa County, I began discussing the situation with a lawyer over there.

I had a basic question - what is the collective criminal defense bar doing?

I heard crickets.

Then: "I think there's been a couple comments in the paper."

I was also told I "didn't understand" the environment there, that lawyers were scared.

That's scary on various levels.

So I took a gander.

I checked out the Arizona Association of Criminal Defense Lawyers, (called Arizona Attorneys for Criminal Justice.

There it was! A link - "What has AACJ done for me lately?" Here, is where I was going to read what the association was doing about events in Maricopa County.

Except it was written by the president 12 months ago.

OK, well, Sheriff Joe was up to his antics 12 months ago - let's see what it says:

"The concerning part is that AACJ is as needed as ever: the county attorneys grandstand, the legislature panders, and the courts cower. Indeed, the same people who ask why we are relevant in almost the same breath recognize we are needed. So, what are we going to do?"

Yes, since that exact situation is going on now - what are you going to do?

Here's the call to action:

In the next year (editors note: meaning right now) this question should be both our focus and goal.

So, let's begin to tell people what we have done for them lately and what we are going to be doing in the future.

There being no update on the website on this mission for this year, I went to the next best section - "News."

No question what's going on now in Maricopa County is news.

Here's the latest news on the website:

Apr 21, 2009
U.S. Supreme Court Limits Vehicle Searches Incident to Arrest

So OK, maybe they're not on top of it when it comes to the web, but how are their members receiving information from an association that wants to "begin to tell people what we have done for them lately and what we are going to do in the future?"

I extend an invitation to the AACJ to provide me any information on their participation in recent events in Maricopa County and I will post it here. I'll also encourage my fellow blawgers to do the same.

Where are you AACJ? What are you doing?

Tell us.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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The Lawyers Of Maricopa County Announce A December 21st Rally

I received the following e-mail today from a lawyer I know and who is a co-organizer of this rally:

On December 21, 1946, the United States Supreme Court reversed the conviction of Irene Morgan for refusing to give up her seat on a bus in violation of Virginia's segregation law. This is just one example of the courage of one person standing up against power wielded with evil, unjust, and self-serving intent. I personally do not plan on sitting down any more in the face of this incompetent, thin thinking, petty little tyrant. On Monday, December 21, 2009, at 12:15 p.m., I would like to rally as many people as we can to the patio in front of the Central Court Building to protest the illegitimate, despicable, and cowardly actions of Andy Thomas and to demand that he be suspended from the State Bar of Arizona. Please circulate this email to as many people as you see fit.

(I am not the author of the e-mail but I am passing this on and I will be there. I wanted to let those of you who have written to me about your sympathies for our troubles here in Maricopa County that we are not sitting around anymore.)

Denise M. Quinterri

We'll be watching.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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Maricopa County: An American Embarrassment

I've watched, but other than posting the video, haven't written about the garbage coming out of Maricopa County, Arizona. I've left it to those who have taken this deflated and disgusting ball, and run with it. Those like Jeff Gamso, who has marvelously written on the disaster that is the judicial system in Maricopa County.

After yesterday's "indictment" of Judge Gary Donohue, I just can't take it anymore.

This, is a disgrace, playing out daily, and evidencing who is really in charge over there.

Cops.

I'm glad this is all happening. Really, I am.

Because this issue of who really runs our judicial system, everywhere in America, is rarely discussed.

Walk into any legislative committee hearing on criminal justice and you'll see it - a smattering of prosecutors, defense lawyers, maybe a judge or two, and then rows and rows of uniformed police officers. One will speak, 25 will be there for effect.

There is no question but that our "first responders" - police, fire, ambulance, need the support and funds of elected officials. But since 9/11 everything has changed. Whatever power police ask for, they usually get. Blind support of law enforcement's desire to pull over more people for more reasons for more searches is what gets votes. The public is tired of crime, and tired of talking about civil rights.

So Judge Donohue held a police officer in contempt. He asked for an apology. He got an indictment. An indictment, signed by the county attorney. This is no longer about justice, it's about taking sides. It's about the cops versus the judges, lawyers versus judges on the issue of police power, and citizens divided on how they feel about their most trusted fellow citizens, cops. No surprise that there are those who didn't know cops couldn't just pilfer through a defense attorney's file in court. There are those who think the defense lawyer should be sanctioned for representing someone who would write a letter that would raise the suspicion of the police. (Not really, but you know what I mean).

In the end, this dust up will cost the taxpayers of Maricopa County, Arizona, millions.

It's time for the feds to swarm in here. This is getting out of hand.

No, it's gotten out of hand.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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Ben Kuehne Wants To Say Thank You

BENEDICT P. KUEHNE
In Grateful Appreciation of the
Overwhelming Community Support of his Innocence

Invites the Community to his
APPRECIATION RECEPTION
On the Occasion of his Vindication

Sky lobby
Bank of America tower
100 S.E. 2nd Street
Miami, Florida 33131
Thursday, December 10, 2009
5:30 p.m. – 7:30 p.m.
RSVP to: RSVP@kuehnelaw.com



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Former Prosecutor's Side Business: Testifying Made Simple

With no fanfare, this story hit the South Florida Sun-Sentinel yesterday.

The headline?

"County commissioner's daughter paid to teach deputies how to testify."

The focus of the story? Well, it began with this:

The daughter of Palm Beach County Commissioner Jess Santamaria has received more than $56,000 in taxpayer money to teach sheriff's deputies how to testify in court.

Yes, rile up mom and pop taxpayer - the story is nepotism - the daughter of a politician got a gig at the expense of taxpayers.

Then we have the "oh, by the way:"

Sheriff Ric Bradshaw signed a contract with Michelle Santamaria last year, after she proposed the classes for deputies and sergeants. The office had never offered training in court testimony, Bradshaw said.

Of course continuing on the focus of the story being the use of taxpayer dollars, we have the typical and shallow denials:

Bradshaw and both Santamarias said Jess Santamaria's position as a commissioner had nothing to do with his daughter's contract.

Right, nothing. Nothing at all.

But maybe this had something to do with it:

Michelle Santamaria, a former prosecutor in the Palm Beach County State Attorney's Office, said she came up with the idea to start a company, called Testifying Made Simple, while working as a prosecutor. She left the job after securing the contract with the sheriff's office.

Her experience with witnesses is typical of the new social media types who have found a way to convince others they are "experienced:"

"I loved being a prosecutor, but with the case load and the volume, I had very little time for family and friends," Santamaria said. "After about a year, I already let them know I was on the way out. I had had this seed planted from being a prosecutor."

Santamaria, 32, said she called Bradshaw's office and requested a meeting with him. She later presented Bradshaw with a business plan.

The Sheriff was concerned: "We had several comments from different prosecutors saying your deputies just aren't doing well in court. They just haven't had the training. They don't get it in the police academy."

In comes the county attorney with the clearance: In a letter to the county, C. Christopher Anderson, the commission's chief assistant general counsel, said the contract did not create a conflict of interest for the commissioner.

Yep. No conflict of interest paying a county commissioner's daughter taxpayer money to teach cops to testify.

Did you see the elephant walk out of the room while you were reading about the mice?

The classes apparently are a big, big hit:

Since signing the contract in December 2008, Michelle Santamaria has held 103 training classes for the sheriff's office. She was paid $550 for each four-hour class, according to her contract. She will teach a final session this month.

And that's the end of the story. Nothing even coming close to questioning this practice. Nothing from a defense lawyer about whether this is fair ground for cross examination.

"So, officer, can you tell us about your participation in "Testifying Made Simple?"

"Well yes counsel, I was student of the week 3 times." "In fact, you see me always looking at the judge and jury, and not at you when I testify? I learned that. Did you hear me chuckle a little when you asked me about your client's confession? That brings me closer to juror #3 who seems to like me and not you." Do I look threatening and agressive to you? That's because I have learned to be a bit more laid back. I also learned a new answer, it goes like this: "the answer is whatever is in the report." See that, I don't have to really answer your question or let the jury know the truth, that I really don't remember.

This is a disgrace. That the paper doesn't even lead the reader to the question of whether this is appropriate is pathetic.

The issue is not taxpayer money being paid to the daughter of a politician. Shame on you reporters.

The issue is the manipulation of our criminal justice system, with taxpayer money.

There is no training in the police academy regarding testifying because testifying IS simple - tell the truth.

Although there seems to be less and less of that, and thus, the need to teach sworn law enforcement how to testify is the result.

Very few reading that story picked up on the left-out angle of that story. I doubt there will be a follow up cry to the editor about anything, and if there is, it will be about the taxpayer dollars issue.

The truth seems to be lost, on everyone.

Brian Tannebaum is a criminal defense lawyer in Miami, Florida practicing in state and federal court. Read his free ebook The Truth About Hiring A Criminal Defense Lawyer. To learn more about Brian and his firm, Tannebaum Weiss, please visit www.tannebaumweiss.com



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